Friday, April 11, 2008

Fighting for your Marriage

Mindy is doing a series on fighting for your marriage. This week she has asked us for our advice on how we fight for our marriage.

About two years ago J and I went through a very bad part of our marriage. There were times I felt I could not be in the marriage any longer. But God is a great God and he gave me the strength and wisdom to preserver through the bad time and the motivation to fight for my marriage. Jeff and I sat down and came up with guardrails to protect our marriage.

*The first one was that we were to never be alone with the opposite sex. EVER.
*Do not give the opposite sex a hug
*Should not be good friends with someone of the opposite sex that you would confide things in them
*check in with each other through out the day
*be open and honest
*respect and courtesy with one another
*not fighting in public

Another thing that I believe you can do to help fight for your marriage is pray for your husband on a consistent basis. It is hard to be mad at or mean to someone you are praying for daily.

And keep porn out of your marriage, I'm surprised how many Christian women think it is ok for them or their husband to look at that garbage. It is toxic and can ruin your marriage.

5 comments:

corrie said...

thanks for the good words... we have similar boundaries and rules to keep things in check...

hope you are feeling better! love ya!

Mindy Said said...

Tonya,

Thank you so much for participating in the Friday Fights series.

Your tips are wonderful and right on the mark. I think one of the best things is that you sat down with your husband and discussed them and agreed on them together.

Thank you for being so honest and sharing your wisdom with us.

Blessings,
Mindy

Nadine said...

Boundaries are always good, especially when you both agree upon them.

sarahgrace said...

Those are some great points! And I'm with Mindy- the communication is a super important part of that. So many couples just expect to implement this stuff without ever talking to each other about it! I'm going to have to check that link out, I'm always for fighting for your marriage!

Terri@SteelMagnolia said...

I AGREE TOTALLY!
My husband agrees w/ all that you listed as well...