Tuesday, November 02, 2010
I don't get to spend one on one time with my dad much but last night we spent about 3 hours together. We talked a lot...ok I talked a lot and he listened. I told him about this relationship I have that I am always unsure of, I never really know where I stand with this person. A lot of times it seems by their actions or lack of action that I really don't matter to them. It hurts me deeply. I have tried to put a positive spin on all the little hurts and I forgive them all the time even when they have no idea they have hurt me. It was really weird to be talking to my dad about this topic but at the same time it was nice because I know he loves me unconditionally. To be quite honest I'm not even sure how we got on the subject of this person. A few things my dad said that really helped put it into perspective were; it seems like there is a lack of maturity which leads to selfishness. As much as he was talking about the other person it made me look at myself because in every relationship there are two people right?! How can I be more mature in my actions toward this person and how can I be more selfless? Because really I have a part in this too. I think in this world we put the blame on others way too much and never take responsibility for the part we play. I want to be better at taking ownership of my mistakes...I've got a long way to go that for sure.